If you haven’t boarded Lagos BRT before, you certainly haven’t seen real Nollywood. Every trip is a blockbuster. Casts are never lacking. From the Pilots (that is what they call BRT drivers) to the ticketing officers and to the passengers. There’s no need for formal plots and scenes, they come in handy. To enjoy the nonstop, unrehearsed movie, your best bet is the back seat or somewhere in the middle.
So the other day, I was enjoying my Saturday ride on BRT; I was going to CMS from Ketu when a big drama broke out.
The scene was the ‘standing committee’ onboard BRT (that’s what they call the passengers who prefer to stand on the aisle in the bus). Members of the standing committee are usually stacked sorry packed like stock fish.
The drama was between a female passenger and a male counterpart.
Enjoy the trip…
A man capitalizing on push me, I push you going on in the standing committee threw his body on the back of the female passenger.
Female Passenger: Oga shift back; you are squeezing my back.
The man pretends he didn’t hear the lady, continues leaning on the lady’s back. The lady very livid at this time shouted…
Female Passenger: Oga, you are squeezing me, abeg go back.
The man didn’t yield to the lady’s call to back off.
The lady on top of her voice this time around shouting…
Female Passenger: Oga, I said you are squeezing me, go back jare!
The man knowing that his squeezing game is up and about to be embarrassed too, puts up a strong defence.
Man: What do you mean by I’m squeezing you? Are you blind; can’t you see these people pushing from behind?
Female Passenger: I don talk finish; if your body touches me again, I will show you.”
Man puts on a straight face this time around
Man: Look at this girl o, look at this small girl; what do you want me to do? Can’t you see all these people at the back?
Female Passenger: Who are you calling a small girl? Is it because I kept quiet since? Let your body touch me again.
Man: Who are you talking to; I will slap you if you talk to me that way again.
Female Passenger: See my cheek; slap it. Slap me and see what will happen to you.
At this time, the rest of the passengers cut in.
Passengers: Oga, leave that girl alone
Passenger 1: That girl should keep quiet too. Her mouth is too sharp
Passenger 2: Why should she keep quiet? If she is your daughter, will you allow somebody to molest her in the name of standing in a bus?
Passenger 1: Lagosians sef! Why are you trying to blow this little thing out of proportion?
Passenger 2: What are you talking about? If you can’t condemn evil, then keep quiet.
Passenger1: Who are you talking to like that?
Passenger 2: Who do you think I am talking to?
Female Passenger: Oga, don’t mind them. That’s how they go about supporting bad things
Passenger 3: Bia this girl, keep quiet there
Female Passenger: Who are you talking to?
Passenger 3: I see you are a troublemaker!
Female Passenger: I see you a trouble finder
Passenger 3: you really lack home training. I don’t need to talk to you again
Female Passenger: I don’t blame you.
A woman rose from her seat, moved over to where the girl stood…
Woman: it’s okay; come and stand here.
Female Passenger: Madam, don’t worry. I am okay here
Woman: I am not sure you are okay there. Avoid all these men.
Female Passenger: Okay Ma
The lady followed the woman to the back seat where there was enough space for to stand.
The lady eventually alighted at Barracks bus stop; the bus stop after Fadeyi bus stop. The moment she alighted, the whole bus became noisy. Some passengers were in support of her for being outspoken while others condemned her attitude for lacking respect.
Meanwhile the man who started the brow did not say anything again until he alighted at Leventis (the bus stop before CMS).
